Monday August 3rd

Hello Readers,
The birthday countdown is at 7/372 days. Groovy. Normally this summer I have struggled to find TDR-worthy stories, events and topics but today was quite different. There was the encouragingly high close of the financial markets. There was Plaxico Burress who, after shooting himself in the leg, was indicted on criminal possesion of a firearm and reckless endangerment and faces up to 15 years in prison. As if accidentally shooting yourself wasn't bad enough. But there was one story so outrageous and utterly unbelievable that it trumped all others today. And that brings us to today's Daily Topic: UNEMPLOYABLE GRADUATE SUES COLLEGE



In an incomprehensible move, Monroe College graduate Trina Thompson is suing her alma mater for the cost of her tuition because she has been unable to find a job since her graduation. The more I read, the more angry I got. Ms. Thompson filed suit for $70,000, the cost of her tuition, and $2000 for the stress that her three-month job search has caused her. She alleges that the job-placement office of Monroe College did not try hard enough to find her a career and that they favor students with a 4.0 gpa rather than her 2.7. Ms. Thompson believes that any REASONABLE employee would jump at the opportunity to hire a graduate with her GPA and "solid attendance record." She also encourages other graduates to file lawsuits against their respective colleges because the fact that a four-year graduate can't find a career in three months during the worst economic downturn since the Great Depression, "doesn't make any sense." No, Ms. Thompson, what doesn't make sense is why you are wasting your time filing a frivolous lawsuit and not still looking for a job. Across the country, tens of thousands of graduates and undergraduates have struggled to find jobs, including your faithful writer. But since you are resorting to legal action, why don't you also consider some of the following. First, you should sue your corner store for not selling you the winning lottery ticket and absolving you from the stress and pain of a job search. Next, you should sue all of the people hired to fill the jobs that you applied for because they are smarter and more qualified than you. Then you should sue the United States government for enacting policies which led to the economic downturn. Don't forget to file suit against your high, middle and elementary schools for not providing you with enough education to get into a better college or at least to do better in the one you attended. Then you should sue Santa Clause for not bringing you a pony when you were 10, even though you claim that the Macy's Santa Clause's promise to deliver one constitutes a verbal contract. Finally, you should sue yourself for being a complete and utter imbecile and for relying on someone else to find you a job. All I have left to say is, watch out USC, because if I don't come out in 2011 with a six figure salary in my first month, I'm coming after you for all that you have.
-ROF

Daily Food: Pasta with Feta and Sauteed Garlic

Daily Activity: Lawsuits

Daily Song: Octopus' Garden - The Beatles

Daily Attire: Hawaiian Legends Tank

Daily News Everyone Should Care About: Investment Banking Buoys HSBC and Barclays Profit

Daily News No One Should Care About: College Grad Can't Find Job, Wants $$$ Back

Daily Life Goal: Find Trina Thompson and Talk Some Sense Into Her

Daily Complaint: No Wind

Daily Drink: Coke

Daily Television: Shark Week

Daily Book: Profiles in Courage by John F. Kenedy